The Habit of Happiness
Happiness is a habit-cultivate it.-Elbert Hubbard
Happiness seems made to be shared.-Corneille
If one thinks that one is happy, that is enough to be happy.-Mme. De La Fayette
Learning to choose you attitude is not easy, but once mastered, a positive attitude paves the way to a fulfilling marriage.
The good news is ….the bad news can be turned into good news…when you change your attitude!-Robert H. Schuller
April.
Wow! It was a humdinger!
I have found the above statements to be so true during the this stressful April and first two weeks of May.
Finishing up the school semester, thinking about/ planning for the wedding and being a support for my sweety has all been a test of my faith in God and proof that my choices about how I respond to what is in my life make a huge difference. Choosing to have a good attitude, trust God and practice positive thoughts are at the core of a living a fresh brewed, captivating life.
I choose to be a woman of affirmation. I choose to be the best helpmate I am able to be for David. I choose to trust God as my provider and the giver of grace for all things. I choose a positive attitude.
Honestly, my attitude has not been great at all times during April. There have been times of intense disappointment, anxiety, and tiredness. But the grace. Being in God’s grace is the best, most comfortable place to be. I almost understand in a deeper way now what Paul was saying when he said consider it all joy brothers when you experience trials of every kind.
So clearly, I can see God’s hand working in this time.
The trials are a gift from Him.
A gift to draw David and I closer together, helping us learn more about each other as we enter into marriage. A gift to see God as our Provider. A gift to see how the relationships we have are here for our support now when we need them. God cares so much about the details of our lives that he sends specific people with similar experiences to come up besides us to support us.
The trials are a gift from Him.
A gift to have a perspective of thankfulness and not taking the small things for granted. Finding the wedding dress on line for $225.00, Dave’s job at Sunny Brae middle school and how that came about, the extra cash that keeps showing up, the incredible people that keep volunteering to help with the wedding, Christine Jones being there to relieve the knots in my neck, a heart to heart with Bethany, the book by Dr. Les and Leslie Parrott, supportive phone calls from Jess and Christine, phone call from Jahna, finding a sub so I can take the whole month of July off from work…….the list goes on and on. And you know what?
The only reason I am in tuned with all these blessings is because life has been hard during this month of April. But I am so happy. Full of grace from God and a blessed assurance that if things don’t go the way I planned them to, God has something better in mind.
The trials are a gift from Him.
And another, you know what? I could make a list as long as my arm about the difficulties and disappointments of April but that would get me know where fast. Been there, done that.
Don’t sabotage your relationships and happiness with self pity, blame, and resentment. Choose to be happy because the trials are a blessing from God. He wants to take care of you. I know from experience.
Pursuing mutual communion with God
Hey, want to know the sacred secret to becoming soul mates? Soul mates for life.
It’s with great excitement that I share this treasure of information with you.
I made this amazing discovery this morning by picking up the writings of Dr. Les and Leslie Parrott by flipping to the back of the book and skimming the last chapter (part of me is really sick of reading self help books, books that are trying to improve your life with their ideas and wisdom, from cover to cover). So now when I choose to read some, I flip to parts that are of value to me at the moment I pick them up.
Inside all of us is a spiritual longing for deeper connection and meaning in our relationships with God and our partners. A longing to have a healthy soul and thriving spirit. Sometimes I can’t identify that’s what the longing and unsettled feeling inside is and even if I do then deciding what to do about it is a struggle.
Inside every marriage relationship is a longing to have healthy souls and feel like God is a thriving part of the union. Well, just as it is essential for individual spiritual life to make time for certain practices that feed your spirit, making time in your married life for spiritual growth is essential to feeling a soul connection with your sweety and finding meaning in the relationship.
Ready for the gems of treasure?
Be Faithful and Forgive each other just like God does for us.
David has always been faithful to me and I never have a doubt in my mind. I know that he is mine, all mine. He forgives me over and over as I stumble and bumble around in this life we are now seeking to share.
We are soul mates for life.
Worship. Make time to go to church. Cultivate relationships with people there. Share the common experience of being at church, hearing a sermon, listening to scriptures and singing songs.
David is always willing and instrumental in getting us to church on Sundays. He has been a leader in settling us into the First Covenant church family and attending weeknight fellowship groups, attending the Sunday night Catalyst worship service. He values this part of our walk with God and I am really grateful.
We are soul mates for life.
Serve. When I think about serving together, I start going all over the place in my head with the possibilities and I also brought some anxiety into the picture by thinking thoughts like this. What if David doesn’t want to serve with me? Or what if he doesn’t want to serve in a way that is comfortable with me? Then I stopped, pulled up many fond memories of my sweety serving in the past, and smiled.
David is an amazing man. He is conversationalist to all and friend to many. His name could be David ‘Service’ Woolsey. He serves with his hands, his resources, his time, and his attention. He pays attention to people, to me. He shares his humor.
TLC camp counselor for three years in a row, sound man every Sunday morning, host of many friend gatherings, manning to barbeque, creating yummy food dishes, keeping the conversations going, bringing the beer, mentor for his nephew, advisor for people’s computer difficulties, giving website advice and ideas, helping people move when moving to a home, giving eggs away, giver of planned meaningful presents, etc………
My man is a servant. The great thing is that I get to do all this with him and my ideas for ways we can serve have been valued. I enjoy being there with him in these areas of service and I also have a lot to give.
We are soul mates for life.
Pray. Pray together. It can be challenging because some people are more comfortable bearing their souls out loud in honest prayer to God than others are. The urge you not to use it as a means to preach to the other person while praying must be denied. The best way to start this means of becoming soul mates is to pray prayers of thanksgiving to God with each other.
David prays with me. Even when the request comes out of the blue at the oddest of times. He comes before God with me when we need it and in a deep way expresses thanksgiving, praises, requests, confusions, surrender.
We are soul mates for life.
Mutual communion with God
Spiritual life has been dry lately.
Time to sit and soak has been limited and last on the priority list.
The bible seems old and irrelevant, prayers seem shallow and empty.
But fellowship, now that is where life is abounding. God speaks to me through his spirit-filled people, individuals that I’m in tune with, feeding and cultivating spiritual life. They have so much to give, so much enthusiasm to share. God, thank you for the amazing relational beings you have created us to be and that those who make time to commune with you can spur us into a great relationship with you. Thanks that behavior is contagious.
Worship is powerful. Instruments that are played in such a way that our spirits respond in soaring heights. Words chosen and phrases crafted to bring God’s ways, name, and existence glory and validity. Worship makes a difference to my soul.
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